Ladies, Lose the Lists

By: Monica

Anyone seen the Ugly Truth with Gerard Butler? Though it's a (romantic) comedy, the movie does have some good lines. Take these for example:

Abby Richter: [gushing about Colin] He's such a great guy.
Mike Chadway: [sarcastically] Oh yeah, he's dreamy.
Abby Richter: And he ticks numbers 1 to 10 on my list.
Mike Chadway: Although, weren't points 1 to 9 pretty much about him being gay?

As a woman, most would expect me to scoff at Mike's blunt and degrading humor. But I don't. In fact, I completely and utterly agree with him. Why? Because he is right. It's as simple as that. Whether written on paper or just pictured in their minds, women DO in fact have lists. Well, most do. But 90% of the lists are full of bullshit. And they are all useless. Let's take a look:
This is what one of those so-called "Men molding" lists might look like:

1. He is a handsome brunette with a strong jawline and nice pecks.
2. He treats me like a lady: holds doors open, buys me flowers, buys me chocolate...etc.
3. His salary is over $100,000.
4. He drinks wine. NO BEER.
5. He drives a car who's model is atleast within a 3 year range.
6. He can cook.
7. He does not live with his parents.
8. He loves children.
9. My parents love him.
10. He can help me shop and tell me if I look good in a dress/bathing suit.

That is just one example. Depending on the girl, she might have specifications, such as "He takes me dancing" or "He loves beach picnics and horseback riding". But, in reality, none of it matters because the person that woman ends up with will most likely shred her list to pieces. Women set these impossible standards for men, forcing them to contort into people they are not. The media tricks them into thinking that, because women squeal at a movie screen where a man is singing his wife to sleep, that THAT is what they have to be. But that is completely FALSE. Now, we have men in this world thinking that women want them to walk right up and say, "You are beautiful. Why don't we go gaze up at the stars together?" When in fact, Ladies, you must admit that this would be nothing short of creepy. Moves like that (if you are going to make them) need to feel natural, not forced. If you're going to get her to watch the stars with you, don't ask her right off the bat. First off, get to know her. You don't want to look like the mushy perv. That's not a good reputation to have. Next, make sure you think she is the type of person that would enjoy something like that. If she has told you time and time again that she would rather go to a hockey game than a fancy restaurant, she means it. This is called listening to her. A good quality to have when you are a guy. After you have done the previous, you may now proceed to the act. But, here's a vital tip: DON'T ASK HER, SHOW HER. Please, for the love of all that is holy, I beg you not to make a fool of yourself by asking her. This gives her a chance to think about it as well as a chance to say "no". Maybe she would think it too awkward, or too personal, or it would simply give her time to think up another excuse. Instead, take her there and show her. If she likes that kind of thing, she'll be thrilled. Females enjoy the element of surprise, no matter how much we state otherwise. Why do you think proposals are surprises? Why do we love that bouquet of flowers so much more when you bring it home on a random day instead of on Valentine's when it's expected?

The point is, women don't want the guys that are cookie cutter to their lists. No. They want a guy who:
1. They are attracted to.
2. They understand and one who understands them.
3. Who makes them feel special (in whichever way he chooses to).

THIS should be a woman's list. Nothing more. Why? Because love is not a formula. Therefore, there are many solutions to the problem and they can come in all shapes, sizes, forms, colors, etc. Women write off so many guys for the pure reason that they are missing some key points of the list. When they think the list is helping them upgrade, it is actually causing them to settle for whoever they meet that fits that mold. It's like being lactose intolerant and not being able to touch the chocolate ice cream. So, if you have learned anything form today's lesson, Ladies, let it be this:

The "Perfect Man" is boring. Rip up your lists and let nature take it's course.